Facing Death with Hope

I am completely switching gears from yesterday to my post today, but I just really wanted to share this blog with you:

http://laneannmiller.blogspot.com/

I have been following this blog for only 2 weeks now and it is incredible. This blog was started by a 47 year old wife and Mom who just last week lost a very short battle with cancer (6 1/2 months). The blog is being continued by her husband, and I am begging you to read his posts. This family has a strong faith in Jesus, and their blog is an honest look at what it is like to have a family member face death as a believer in Jesus. When you know you will be in heaven with Jesus when you die, you have a completely different perspective on death than those who do not have this hope. This perspective continues to shine through on every single one of this husband’s post. I have been so challenged in my faith by this family. They just have such an awesome testimony, and they are allowing others to read in on their grieving process and all the while still giving God glory for Lane Ann’s life and also giving Him glory in her death. I am sharing an excerpt of one of the husband’s posts below, but I hope you click on the blog link above and read all of the other ones as well. I do not know this family, but the husband is the brother of a different blog (adoption) that I have been following for over a year. This excerpt is just one of the heart-wrenching, honest, and truth-filled posts that this husband has written. I know you will be heart-broken and yet filled with hope as you take in his words. This excerpt was written a few days before his wife passed away….

Final Stages - an honest description of death

Last night Lane Ann slipped into a coma. Since one's hearing is the last to go, Jessie read aloud to her mom the multiple posts on Lane Ann's facebook wall. I read the many cards to her that have come in the last few days. She was at peace and we waited expectantly as she slept. Surely this would be the time God would send His angels to come and get her. I drifted into a kind of dreamy half-sleep prepared to wake up at the slightest hint that They had arrived. But They did not come. As my exhausted spirit floated between consciousness and exhausted bliss my mind played through the scenes of the last six and one half months.

The echoing voices of our many doctors disturbed my relaxed slumber as seconds turned into days - "I'm afraid you have colon cancer and it is in your liver as well. I'm so sorry." "You'll need surgery immediately." "More tumors than I can count." "I'm afraid it is stage four. Treatable but not curable." "It is impossible for medical science to cure this type of cancer." "I've never seen cancer spread this quickly." "This last chemo treatment didn't work. Your tumors are growing again." "You have weeks to months left to live."

Other memories flooded my sluggish thoughts - "Tim, am I going to die?" "Lane Ann, if God doesn't heal you, yes, sweetheart you're going to die." (Those were the hardest words I have ever spoken.) "What do we do now?" "We trust God and we live. We plant a garden and grow flowers and eat shrimp in Florida. We finish decorating the house and we love one another like there is no tomorrow."

We both decided to focus intently on God's desire for healing her body. As time passed, it became clear God was going to heal her alright, but not this side of eternity. The night passed and she actually awoke for a brief moment and rolled her head to the side to kiss my cheek. Then, as quickly as she awoke, she went back to sleep.

Ever since that tender moment she has been experiencing what is called "terminal restlessness." This is a state where the illness causes restless behavior like reaching into the air, rolling around, and trying to get out of bed. Lane Ann's blood pressure is low and the oxygen needed to flow to the brain is not getting there causing her to talk senselessly as her eyes roll back into her head. Additionally, her liver is not metabolizing properly and apparently causing considerable pain. I was not prepared for this stage of death. It has absolutely rocked my emotional world. How could this happen to my beautiful, dignified, intelligent friend? It is ripping my guts out. I know this too will pass but not near quick enough for me. Our wonderful Hospice nurse is working overtime to get the proper medications to ease Lane Ann's suffering.

Even though this has been an emotionally grueling day, we can still feel the prayers of you guys. Yesterday, Grant and I (I am so proud of him) made arrangements with the funeral home and also purchased the needed cemetery plots. I never thought I would be buying cemetery plots at age 47. As morbid as it sounds, we could sense God's direction leading us ever closer to our moment of celebration. We Will NOT be mourning the dead but celebrating the living.

I hope that reading this excerpt causes you to take some time to read his other posts - and if you do - make sure to read this one from start to finish http://laneannmiller.blogspot.com/2010/04/visitationfuneral.html